At Bartolomeo and Perotto Funeral Home, we’ve walked alongside thousands of families during their most tender moments of grief. After serving the Rochester community for decades, we’ve learned that no two lives are ever the same, and neither should their farewells be. Personalizing a burial service is more than a trend. It’s a deeply meaningful way to honor a loved one’s legacy. It helps families heal and ensures that the ceremony reflects the individual we are saying goodbye to. In our decades of experience with families in Rochester, we’ve seen firsthand how the demand for truly personalized burial services has surged.
In fact, according to data posted by Gitnux, it shows that nearly 70% of consumers now prefer personalized funeral services, from custom ceremonies to bespoke keepsakes, underscoring a powerful desire to honor unique lives in equally unique ways. In this post, we’ll guide you through practical, heartfelt ways to personalize a burial service. Whether you’re planning in advance or making arrangements after a loss, we hope these suggestions help you create a service as unique as the life it celebrates.
Begin with a Conversation
The first step in personalizing a burial service is simple, we start with a conversation. At our funeral home, we sit down with families in a calm, compassionate setting and just talk. We ask about the person’s hobbies, achievements, personality, and favorite memories.
Did they love gardening? Were they a proud veteran? Did they adore jazz or cheer every Sunday for the Bills? These stories guide every part of the planning process. We believe the most meaningful services are born from authentic conversations. It’s our job to listen, gently ask the right questions, and uncover the essence of the person we’re honoring.
Choose a Meaningful Location
While traditional burial services are often held in our chapel or a house of worship, we always encourage families to think outside the box. We’ve helped organize services in local parks, family homes, veterans’ memorials, and even favorite fishing spots. In Rochester, we’re fortunate to be surrounded by beautiful settings from Highland Park to Lake Ontario. If your loved one had a special place they cherished, we’ll help bring the service there. We handle the logistics, permits, and transportation so you can focus on the meaning of the moment.
Incorporate Personal Items
One of the most visually powerful ways to personalize a service is through personal items. We’ve seen families bring in everything from hand-knit scarves to military medals to favorite fishing lures. These artifacts tell a story without a single word. We often set up a memory table or display area where guests can walk through the life of the person who’s passed. Photo boards, scrapbooks, handmade crafts, awards, uniforms, all of it brings a unique and personal dimension to the service.
Highlight Their Favorite Music
Music has a way of touching the heart like nothing else. One song can bring back a flood of memories. At Bartolomeo and Perotto, we work closely with families to choose music that reflects the spirit of their loved one.
Whether it’s a classic hymn, a Frank Sinatra ballad, or a playlist of favorite rock songs, we make it happen. Live music is also an option as local Rochester musicians or family members are often honored to perform. We’ve even arranged for bagpipes, gospel choirs, and string quartets. If the music mattered to them, it matters to us.
Design a Custom Casket or Urn
Caskets and urns are no longer limited to traditional styles. Personalization can be subtle or bold, but either way, it can make a lasting impact. We’ve helped families choose caskets in custom colors, engraved with personal messages, adorned with emblems that speak to military service or cultural heritage. For cremation services, urns can be crafted from materials like wood, glass, or even repurposed items that held sentimental value. Some families choose biodegradable urns for natural burials, incorporating seeds or tree saplings that symbolize life continuing.
Invite Guests to Participate
Interactive elements can be incredibly healing. We’ve seen guests write farewell notes and place them in the casket, light candles during the service, or each will place a single flower on the grave. These small gestures build connection and make the experience more personal. We sometimes provide memory cards where guests can write down a special moment they shared with the person. These notes are collected and given to the family afterward and are a beautiful keepsake that becomes part of the healing process.
Reflect Their Community Involvement
Was your loved one active in a local club, volunteer organization, or sports league? Many times, these groups are eager to be involved in the farewell. We’ve helped arrange processions with motorcycle clubs, color guards from local VFW posts, and neighborhood send-offs with homemade signs and music. Rochester is a city full of tight-knit communities. We make it easy for groups to take part because when someone gives back during their lifetime, their community is often ready to honor them in return.
Offer a Themed Reception
After the burial service, many families choose to hold a reception or gathering. This can be another opportunity to reflect the personality of the person we’re honoring. We’ve seen receptions with barbecue buffets, cookie decorating tables, Irish folk bands, or even tailgate-style celebrations for die-hard sports fans. Our on-site reception center in Rochester is available for catered gatherings, but we also help coordinate with local restaurants, VFW halls, or private homes. We believe these moments of sharing food and stories are a vital part of healing.
Create Lasting Keepsakes
Personalized mementos help carry the memory of a loved one into the days ahead. We offer options like fingerprint jewelry, memorial candles, photo blankets, or custom-engraved plaques. Some families create memory jars where guests leave written messages. Others choose to plant a memorial tree or dedicate a bench in a favorite park.
These keepsakes become anchors for remembrance, especially in the first year of grief. We help families choose options that feel meaningful and lasting. Even after the burial service is over, remembrance continues.
We often work with families to set up anniversary rituals or memorial events. Some come back to visit the gravesite on birthdays, light candles during holidays, or hold private ceremonies with family. We also offer grief support groups and remembrance events throughout the year at Bartolomeo and Perotto. Our annual Holiday Remembrance Service is one example, where families gather to honor loved ones and find support from others who understand.
Stay True to Their Story
Above all, our mission is to stay true to the story of the person who has passed. There is no template for a life well-lived, and we don’t believe in cookie-cutter services. Whether it’s simple or elaborate, traditional or modern, a personalized burial service is a gift to the family and to the memory of the one being honored.
We are always humbled by the trust families place in us. It’s an honor to help tell each story with dignity, care, and heart. At Bartolomeo and Perotto Funeral Home, we’ve dedicated our lives to helping families in Rochester create meaningful goodbyes. A personalized burial service is not only a reflection of a person’s life, it’s a reflection of your love for them.
Contact Us Today
If you’re thinking about planning ahead or have recently experienced a loss, we’re here to guide you. We invite you to visit our funeral home, speak with our compassionate team, and learn how we can help you honor your loved one in the way they truly deserve. Let’s tell their story beautifully, personally, and with love.