Gretchen and I went to high school together but did not become friends until I went to work with her at Jerry’s office! She was great at her job and she was a wonderful mom. We used to get our kids together and I remember one time traveling up to Toronto for a Yankees game! I think my favorite memories were of us getting together every year to celebrate our birthdays in February. We would have lunch and talk for hours! We didn’t get to do that this year and now I won’t get to do that with her again. My heart is sad. Jake, Zac and Eric I am so sorry for your loss! Please know that Gretchen will always be in my heart and I will think of her often and I was honored to call her my friend. Thinking of all of you!! Ellen Swift and family
From the day I met Gretchen about 2 years ago until a few days ago when I last saw her, it never once crossed my mind that I’d never see her again. 5 days a week we worked together. Not a single day went by where we didn’t talk. All the gossip we shared, all the frustration we vented, all the Tully’s chicken tenders & DiBella’s subs we ate, all the orange soda we drank, all the snacks she shared with me when I was hungry, all the sour skittle bags she bought me for my birthday, all the homemade meals she had me try leftover from her son visiting, all the times I made fun of her for how loud her flip flops were… it’s all in the past now. My heart was literally hurting the whole drive home after hearing the news. From the second we got the news all the way through this very second, no other words come to my mind other than “weird”. It just doesn’t feel real.. as if I’m in a bad dream… or that Gretchen is suddenly going to “come to her senses” and wake up because of how tough she was. But I need to face reality and know that’s not going to happen. This whole situation really makes you think about how precious life is. Here one day, gone the next. Work will never feel the same without you. I’ll miss you forever Gretchen.
If you asked Gretchen what she was most proud of she would say Jake and her reputation as a paralegal, in that order. She was inspiring to watch. She suffered setbacks in her personal life when she was a young mom. And while others would have been quick to blame those involved she always acknowledged her shared responsibility for her obstacles. That was her, always honest, even to her detriment. She always said “I will own it if I’m wrong”, and she always did. She was not only brilliant but self aware.
In no part of her life were her best qualities more clearly on display than in carrying out her responsibility to be a mom to Jacob. While she and Larry had their differences and each could have been bitter towards the other, they each put those differences aside for Jake. He was the center of her world and no sacrifice was too big, discomfort to great, feeling too overwhelming to stand in the way of her love for her boy. Being a mama was her highest calling. Gretchen fulfilled that labor of love more open heartedly and more completely that anything else in her life and more successfully than most anyone I know. Gretchen not only believed but lived by the idea that a child doesn’t choose to come to you in life, you bring that child here. Because of that, there was nothing Gretchen would not do for her boy. She was completely selfless in how she raised Jake. If you know Jake and the wonderful young man he has become, you know Gretchen was a huge success as a mom.
She was also a huge success in her professional life. While the importance of that accomplishment does not rise to the level of her being a mom, what she accomplished is truly amazing. She would have been a gifted real estate attorney had she gone to law school but instead she chose to be a real estate paralegal. Her natural intelligence, her wisdom about people and her desire to be the best propelled her to the top of her chosen field. When you read stories about sports teams, often the writer speaks about how those on the team always know who the best players are. If you ask anyone who knew and worked with Gretchen in Rochester, it would be surprising if they didn’t say that she was among the best if not the best residential real estate paralegal in the area. That reputation meant a lot to Gretchen. She was proud of the hard-earned reputation she built for herself even though she would never acknowledge those accomplishments. She would always talk of how she could be better, how she needed to improve. That was what made her great at what she did.
Beyond being a mom and a paralegal, Gretchen was a true and loyal friend. She was very guarded about who she allowed into her life. Her experiences led her to be cautious and maybe even skeptical. But when she became your friend, you could count on her for anything. She was not an affectionate person but that didn’t mean she did not love deeply. In nearly 25 years of knowing her I could count on one hand how many times she hugged me. That didn’t mean she didn’t care. Quite the contrary. She was an ally that a friend could always count on. She had an innate sense of what you needed and the wisdom, brilliance and talent to just take care of things. She was a confidant, an advisor and fierce friend. In 25 years I never told her I loved her. While she knew how I felt, I wish I would have told her. I lost a little sister that I was so proud of. She left a big hole in many lives by leaving so early. I pray she is at peace and that she sees how much she meant to so many people. She would be surprised but happy to know how big and important a part she was of so many people’s lives.
Gretchen and I went to high school together but did not become friends until I went to work with her at Jerry’s office! She was great at her job and she was a wonderful mom. We used to get our kids together and I remember one time traveling up to Toronto for a Yankees game! I think my favorite memories were of us getting together every year to celebrate our birthdays in February. We would have lunch and talk for hours! We didn’t get to do that this year and now I won’t get to do that with her again. My heart is sad. Jake, Zac and Eric I am so sorry for your loss! Please know that Gretchen will always be in my heart and I will think of her often and I was honored to call her my friend. Thinking of all of you!! Ellen Swift and family
From the day I met Gretchen about 2 years ago until a few days ago when I last saw her, it never once crossed my mind that I’d never see her again. 5 days a week we worked together. Not a single day went by where we didn’t talk. All the gossip we shared, all the frustration we vented, all the Tully’s chicken tenders & DiBella’s subs we ate, all the orange soda we drank, all the snacks she shared with me when I was hungry, all the sour skittle bags she bought me for my birthday, all the homemade meals she had me try leftover from her son visiting, all the times I made fun of her for how loud her flip flops were… it’s all in the past now. My heart was literally hurting the whole drive home after hearing the news. From the second we got the news all the way through this very second, no other words come to my mind other than “weird”. It just doesn’t feel real.. as if I’m in a bad dream… or that Gretchen is suddenly going to “come to her senses” and wake up because of how tough she was. But I need to face reality and know that’s not going to happen. This whole situation really makes you think about how precious life is. Here one day, gone the next. Work will never feel the same without you. I’ll miss you forever Gretchen.
If you asked Gretchen what she was most proud of she would say Jake and her reputation as a paralegal, in that order. She was inspiring to watch. She suffered setbacks in her personal life when she was a young mom. And while others would have been quick to blame those involved she always acknowledged her shared responsibility for her obstacles. That was her, always honest, even to her detriment. She always said “I will own it if I’m wrong”, and she always did. She was not only brilliant but self aware.
In no part of her life were her best qualities more clearly on display than in carrying out her responsibility to be a mom to Jacob. While she and Larry had their differences and each could have been bitter towards the other, they each put those differences aside for Jake. He was the center of her world and no sacrifice was too big, discomfort to great, feeling too overwhelming to stand in the way of her love for her boy. Being a mama was her highest calling. Gretchen fulfilled that labor of love more open heartedly and more completely that anything else in her life and more successfully than most anyone I know. Gretchen not only believed but lived by the idea that a child doesn’t choose to come to you in life, you bring that child here. Because of that, there was nothing Gretchen would not do for her boy. She was completely selfless in how she raised Jake. If you know Jake and the wonderful young man he has become, you know Gretchen was a huge success as a mom.
She was also a huge success in her professional life. While the importance of that accomplishment does not rise to the level of her being a mom, what she accomplished is truly amazing. She would have been a gifted real estate attorney had she gone to law school but instead she chose to be a real estate paralegal. Her natural intelligence, her wisdom about people and her desire to be the best propelled her to the top of her chosen field. When you read stories about sports teams, often the writer speaks about how those on the team always know who the best players are. If you ask anyone who knew and worked with Gretchen in Rochester, it would be surprising if they didn’t say that she was among the best if not the best residential real estate paralegal in the area. That reputation meant a lot to Gretchen. She was proud of the hard-earned reputation she built for herself even though she would never acknowledge those accomplishments. She would always talk of how she could be better, how she needed to improve. That was what made her great at what she did.
Beyond being a mom and a paralegal, Gretchen was a true and loyal friend. She was very guarded about who she allowed into her life. Her experiences led her to be cautious and maybe even skeptical. But when she became your friend, you could count on her for anything. She was not an affectionate person but that didn’t mean she did not love deeply. In nearly 25 years of knowing her I could count on one hand how many times she hugged me. That didn’t mean she didn’t care. Quite the contrary. She was an ally that a friend could always count on. She had an innate sense of what you needed and the wisdom, brilliance and talent to just take care of things. She was a confidant, an advisor and fierce friend. In 25 years I never told her I loved her. While she knew how I felt, I wish I would have told her. I lost a little sister that I was so proud of. She left a big hole in many lives by leaving so early. I pray she is at peace and that she sees how much she meant to so many people. She would be surprised but happy to know how big and important a part she was of so many people’s lives.